We’ve heard the old Tom Petty song “Free Fallin” a couple of times on the radio recently, and Aubrey has decided that she likes it.

After all these years, I still like it too. But for some reason — probably the new association of it in my mind with thoughts of my 11-year-old daughter — I think about it differently.

Mr. Petty’s intention, such as it is — the song is about a “good girl” whose heart he’s broken — is to poke fun at traditional notions of what makes a “good girl.”

It makes me think of how often I invoke the concept.

“Be a good girl.”

I say that a lot to Aubrey and Melody. It just comes out, almost without thinking, like when we’re leaving them with someone, or they’re going to sleep over at a friend’s.

It’s innocent enough, and they know what I mean: to remember their manners, be obedient, and all that. But I’ve come to think it’s probably the wrong idea, or at least the wrong focus.

Instead of “Be a good girl,” it should be “Be God’s girl.”

Be His. And He will make you good.

It reflects an understanding of how Christianity is supposed to work that is different from how I’ve understood it for most of my life.

So I think maybe that is what I will start saying to my daughters.

“Be God’s girl.”

Has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?